Tag Archives: Caricature

Postcard Mailers

I know, I know – who uses the mail anymore?  Well, I am going to a little bit when I send out these postcard mailers. If everyone in art/design school  is being advised that this is an arcane practice (they are), then it means maybe my antiquated paper promo with authentic “stamps” will be unique!  Special! Not at the bottom of a pile of similar crap!  We’ll see. I’ll send them out and see what happens. That’s like, The Secret, right? These mailers are my intentions and the post office box is the universe, and my future clients are god or something? I haven’t read that book.

Oooh! Sexy promotional piece! If you are a magazine or publisher, look out. This might be under a romance manuscript in your slush pile. Just staring off to the left of you. Asking, “What does it all mean?”

It means hire me.

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“Glamerous Beauties”: the Article

Speaking of child beauty pageants (oddly, not sarcasm), Jezebel had a hilarious post from Normal Woman (to be differentiated from a Pageant Mom, which is  the title of another country altogether, one located far from the planet Earth) Tracie Egan Morrissey, who entered her baby in a pageant, “for the story”.  And quite a story it is:

 

(Obviously this photo is not mine but Tracie’s and is compliments of and referring to the Jezebel article in question. Now click that link:)

 

Read it, weep, then have a chuckle or a bit of a laugh as you look over the ever-growing collection of pageant baby gifs that I keep making (for some reason*) and see how exaggerated they apparently are not.   The article even references an actual toddler in a Madonna cone bra, which I really thought I was “hilarious” and “over the top” when I drew it here, but when Julia Robert’s hooker outfit from Pretty Woman is something mother’s dress their 3 year olds in, then a cone bra is… child’s play. (yessss)

*  A friend recently asked me what the joke was with all of the gifs and I had no response. Now I see my response should have been to say, “The job of the artist is always to deepen the mystery.~Francis Bacon”  and then punch myself in the face. I have no idea why I keep making these ridiculous gifs, is the answer.

Pals & Gals!

A few pals + A fun day of food and games = A few doodles! Thanks for a great day, pals (and well done to Steve, Ali and the other friends who came and went on a delightful day in).

 

Oh No You Di-in’t!

This is Magenta (her parents think they are the first people to use “Magenta” as a name).  Her sassy attitude won her Grand Supreme at the Glitter Smiles Princess Pageant and she’s sure to take home a crown today!  Her favourite food is popsicles and her favourite colour is – Oh no you di’in’t – oh yes they did – MAGENTA!

On twitter: @GillianGoerz

On Facebook: Gillian G. Illustration

Official Site: GillianG.com

I do declare!

Well, I do declare, it’s Brianna, our little Southern Belle! Her favourite food is meat balls and her favourite colour is Orange! She loves to stand still, watch TV, and spend time with Peaches, her Guinea pig.

 

More of these bright young things to come.  Trying to get back to the Wed/Sat posting. We’ll so how I do.

Coleslawshank Redemption

Heh.

I’ve seen people dumpster diving behind the corner grocery store near my house, and frankly, I am almost always so jealous of the sweet stuff they are getting. Barely wilted arugula in a tub that I paid $3.99 for the day before. Who is the fool here?  “He or She who is without shame gets the free veggies from the dumpster” – Morgan Freeman, March of the Penguins*

Follow me on twitter if you want: @GillianGoerz

*This quote may in fact be a total made up lie. Better watch that Penguin movie to be sure. They are like little humans with bigger hearts until they do something “cruel” and then it’s just their nature.

The Mona Snooki/The Snooki Lisa

Enigmatic. Her almost smile. Her eyes that by looking in two different directions, follow you wherever you go. No clue will solve her, and no man shall tame her. She is Snooki. Bitches.

Rosemary’s… Bieber?

I am preparing email promo material in the form of a National Enquirer-style celebrity rag.  Here’s a sample sketch.

Teen angst from HELL!

The title of this post is the heading that accompanies it. Hilariously, I have ZERO opinion on the star in question. I have never even heard his music, but twitter’s trending topics says he is hot stuff and a disney-style celebu-tot is always fair game in my books.

Update, Mar. 7, 2012: When I was sick for two+ gruelling weeks in February, I watched Never Say Never on Netflix.  So I can never again say I have never heard the Bieb’s music, or know nothing about him.  I have to say, I did not know that JB was a legit musical prodigy. They showed him playing the drums well at age 8 or younger. It was nuts.   -G.