Tag Archives: Toddlers&Tiaras

Li’L Lizzy

This little diva models herself after the late great Elizabeth Taylor.  She’s got diamonds (fake rubies) on her neck and stars (and hearts) in her eyes.


Official Site: GillianG.com

“Glamerous Beauties”: the Article

Speaking of child beauty pageants (oddly, not sarcasm), Jezebel had a hilarious post from Normal Woman (to be differentiated from a Pageant Mom, which is  the title of another country altogether, one located far from the planet Earth) Tracie Egan Morrissey, who entered her baby in a pageant, “for the story”.  And quite a story it is:

 

(Obviously this photo is not mine but Tracie’s and is compliments of and referring to the Jezebel article in question. Now click that link:)

 

Read it, weep, then have a chuckle or a bit of a laugh as you look over the ever-growing collection of pageant baby gifs that I keep making (for some reason*) and see how exaggerated they apparently are not.   The article even references an actual toddler in a Madonna cone bra, which I really thought I was “hilarious” and “over the top” when I drew it here, but when Julia Robert’s hooker outfit from Pretty Woman is something mother’s dress their 3 year olds in, then a cone bra is… child’s play. (yessss)

*  A friend recently asked me what the joke was with all of the gifs and I had no response. Now I see my response should have been to say, “The job of the artist is always to deepen the mystery.~Francis Bacon”  and then punch myself in the face. I have no idea why I keep making these ridiculous gifs, is the answer.

I do declare!

Well, I do declare, it’s Brianna, our little Southern Belle! Her favourite food is meat balls and her favourite colour is Orange! She loves to stand still, watch TV, and spend time with Peaches, her Guinea pig.

 

More of these bright young things to come.  Trying to get back to the Wed/Sat posting. We’ll so how I do.

Little Bo Peepers

I can’t get enough of drawing these tiny glamour queens! This one has lost her sheep, but she’ll use her laser vision to find them.  Or to hypnotize you. She will be Grand Supreme, no matter what it takes.

Lil’ Beauties

Why stop with just one? Here’s another pageant toddler and another gif!

Cadence wants to win… OR ELSE.

Honey Boo Boo Child

If you are like me (and I think you are) you may sometimes enjoy the grotesque display of “reality” that is Toddlers & Tiaras.  You may, like me, love to hate it. Like me, you may not seek it out directly, but when it comes your way, Oh you shall laugh.

I am sure the internet-using world is familiar by now with T&T “star” Alana who’s “special juice is gonna help her wiiiiiin”, and who’s mother is the “coupon queen”.  A dollah makes me hollah too, so I obviously I relate.

The top one is the daughter.

Oh tangents, when will you ever take us to the point?  <soooooon, my lovessss>  (ugh! creepy tangent voice.)

THE POINT is that the friend who introduced me to Alana in the first place had a birthday, a birthday he shares with another friend. Two friends, one boy, one girl, one shared birthday. Together, they are the Superbabies. Two little babies, born on the same day, in the same year. Two grown up babies that are crazy if they think they are gonna beat Alana, Honey boo boo child!  I did this little drawing for both of them as a present. Happy Birthday (last week. *cough*) Superbabies!

@GillianGoerz for tweets!